Tag Archive | children

New Floridians

My family and I just took a huge leap of faith! Well I guess it was more like a stroll of faith if you consider how long it actually took for it to come to fruition!

In April of 2024 my husband was recommended to apply for a new position by a friend who had just accepted a similar position with the same company. The main requirement was that we needed to relocate to the Orlando Florida area. We discussed the pros and cons for our family of 4, but ultimately made the decision that he would at least apply and we would see what happens. Within 3 weeks of him hearing about the job; he applied, passed the assessment, interviewed, and was offered the position! It was kind of like a whirlwind romance.

He accepted the position and we started the process of preparing to move from Southern NJ, just outside of Philly, where I was born and raised, to Florida. Living in Florida has always been my dream! The beautiful, paradise like climate, the beautiful views and all the things to see and do. No to mention my dream retirement is to work in a shop for Disney or Universal! I was 42 at the time, he was 40, and I truly felt that the universe and God put this opportunity in front of us for a reason. We wanted to have better opportunities for our children and their dreams and interests! My 10yr daughter is interested in the space program and my 6yo son wants to be a farmer.

I am incredibly excited for this new chapter and all of the things we will be able to accomplish and experience!

I say that it was a stroll of faith because we decided to build a home in a new community which took time, and we also chose to allow our children to finish the school year in NJ. So my husband moved down to start his new job in November and I stayed behind with our kids to sell the house, finish the school year and complete the move!

We have been here just about a week now and while we are still unpacking and getting settled, I have high hopes for the days and years to come! If tou want to achieve your dreams you have to fight for them! Take the leap, or stroll, of faith and make it happen!

How hard is too hard?

How hard is too hard? That is the question that I asked myself today. I am referring to how hard we push our kids outside their comfort zone. How hard is too hard to push them to try something new? How hard is too hard to push them to do something you know they will love and asked to do but when the time comes to do it they refuse?

That is the exact situation I was in today with E. But let me backup and start from the beginning. Last spring we signed E up for tot soccer with our local town program. This was his first time on a team (he had taken gymnastics class when he was 2 but that was different)He had just turned 4. We wanted him to have something to do outside of tv watching and video games (which we do limit throughout the week.) But we want him to learn how to work with others, how to be on a team, and how to follow directions from someone other than parents and teachers. And honestly, learning to be a coachable kid is a huge skill that I think most parents forget to teach their children. he absolutely loved playing soccer. It was 8 weeks on Saturday morning and he couldn’t get enough! He even told me that he couldn’t wait to play in the next season!

Cut to the next season! The first practice of the season he did well! Took some coaxing to get him on the field but once he was out there he had a blast. The next week dad took him. When we refused to play for almost 30 minutes (of the 45 minute practice) dad let him leave and then took away electronic privileges for the remainder of the day. I dis agreed with dad allowing him to leave. I thought he should have made him at least stay the full time and watch the practice.

Well that is the situation I was in today. We arrive and he is kicking the ball around with me having a great time, but when it is time to go on the field with his team, he has none of it. He DOES NOT want to go out there. He told me is scared but would not tell him why he is scared. It was not drop off soccer. There is a designated area for the parents to stand and watch, which is the complete outer rim of the playing field. All the parents were right there cheering their kids on. So that is where I tried to stand, while trying to coax him out there. But I ask, how hard is too hard?

He has 4 friends on his team from school, which I thought would totally help get him out there. But again, he would have none of it. I coaxed him to at least sit on his ball at the very edge cone on the field. It was a start. One of the youth assistant coaches came over and he was not having it. I finally got E to tell me that he was scared because the coaches were not the same coaches as last year and he didn’t know them! OK!! Progress! We identified the fear!! Then another youth assistant coach came over to work with, but this time he hung in there. I asked his name, Brent, and explained that E was scared that he didn’t know the coaches. Brent got down to his level, introduced himself, and told E a little bit about himself. That didn’t get him on the field but it made him a little more comfortable.

All the while this is happening, I am standing just 2 feet from him. Allowing the coaches to do what they do. After a few minutes, E ran back to me. I asked him to at least try. I didn’t care if he kicked the ball all over the field, scored a goal, or even ran around. I just wanted him to try to stand on the field with his teammates. I informed that if daddy found out he didn’t even try he would lose his electronics privileges again (probably not the best tactic but I was desperate.) Then his friend’s mom said that she would give him a lollipop if he stood with his teammates (again, bribery is probably not the best solution but I am still desperate here.)

With only 10 minutes left in the 45 minute practice, he met the head coach, Coach Elena and her sister, the assistant coach. They offered to allow him to stand with Coach Elena and help coach the team. Be coaches in training! He got out there. He stood with Coach Elena and observed at first! But then ball got kicked right to him and he kicked it back! All the parents on the sides helped me cheer him on, which was awesome because it really does take a village. And that was all he needed! I yelled to him how proud I am of him and he was off to the races. I stuck it out with him for 35 minutes and it worked!

I was ready to give in but I didn’t! I taught him that we don’t quit. When we overcome an obstacle it makes us so proud! He was so proud of himself when the practice was finished! And I am so proud of him for getting out there!

The Village

There is so much truth to the phrase “It takes a village!” It truly does. My daughter has just turned 4 years old and I am 9 months pregnant with my son. I had two birthday parties for Fi because I have a large family and lots of friends and I just could not fit everyone in one party. So I did what any logical and sane expectant mother would do, I had two! One for family and one for friends!

I have always been the person that doesn’t ask for help! I always need to do things on my own! I feel bad asking people for help, like it actually hurts me to ask for help. I have high anxiety and I never want to put anyone out. But this past week celebrating my baby girl just proved to me that is really does take a village. There is no way I could have thrown two parties and tackled Halloween, because why not have a holiday thrown in the mix, without the help of my family and friends. They helped me clean, set up, pick up food, take care of disasters that had occurred (like a wine spill all over my living room and the birthday girl,) and giving out cake and leftovers at the end of the parties. I honestly don’t know how I would have made Fi’s birthday so special!

I probably didn’t need to go all out but right after turning 4 her baby brother is going to be born and her world is going to be forever changed. It will no longer be just mommy, Appa and her. She will no longer have our undivided attention and with her personality I know that it will be hard for her. So I think that is why I went all out. One last hurrah before she becomes a big sister. Sorta of like a bachelorette party before the big day lol. But I wanted her to have this before everything changes.

I know that it is changing for the better, as does she, but that doesn’t mean that it isn’t a lot for a 4 year old. I am just glad that I was able to last without going into labor until after her week long birthday celebration. I knew that I could not do that to her since she was so excited to celebrate being a big girl 4 year old!

As all of this was happening I was just in awe and amazement at my friends and family that went out of their way to help me. They MADE me sit and rest and just shout out orders to them while they did everything! You never realize what amazing people you have in your life until you don’t even realize that you need them! They step up and show you just how much you matter to them! If you have a village, embrace them, have some wine and know that you are loved. If you don’t have a village, find one, or hell join mine! I think I have the best village out there. I know that any one of them would drop everything for me if I needed them and they know that I would do the same for them! Here’s to the village because every mom needs hers!

That Moment!

I had that moment last night! You know that moment that every parent has! That every parent says you will have when you get pregnant! That moment! Nothing special was happening, nothing out of our normal every night bedtime routine. My husband and I had changed our daughter’s diaper, put her in her pajamas and was getting her ready for bed. I was holding her, rocking her in my arms and she as was drinking her bottle all by herself, as she has now learned to do. Her lullabys were playing and the lights were dim. It was just another night at bedtime. But it was the night that it hit me! Hit me big time! I looked down at her innocent face and Wham!!! Like a slap in the face! She was my little girl! I had created this amazing little person! I was responsible for her; for her happiness, her love, her nourishment, her everything! I knew then and there that I would do absolutely anything to make sure that she had everything she could possible need or want! My heart swelled and tears began to form as I realized a love that I never thought possible! Is it possible to love someone this much? Is it possible that the human heart is big enough for this feeling?

Today she is napping her pack and play while my cousin is installing a ceiling fan in her room. As I watch her sleep I think about all the things I want to teach her, things I want to show her and places I want to take her. I want her to have every opportunity to do and experience things in her life. I want her to see the world as a place full of light and possibilities. I want her to know that she can accomplish anything she desires. I want her to know that she is capable of anything she puts her mind to. I want her to know that this world is hers for the taking! I want to teach her that no matter what she is loved and cherished by those around her. I want to teach her that the world is nothing to be afraid of. I want to teach her to soar and dream! I want to show her all the ends of the earth! I want to show her how beautiful the world can be, how peaceful the sea after a storm. I want to give her the world!

Half a year…Gone!

I cannot believe that so much time has passed. It feels like it was only yesterday…it was only yesterday that I did not have a care in the world…only yesterday that I could come and go as I pleased without having to answer to anyone or even worry about anyone else…only yesterday that I could sleep in and get out of bed whenever I felt like it. But it wasn’t only yesterday…it has been 6 months. That is right…it is 6 months since my little love, Fiona, Fiona was born. I cannot believe that has been half a year already. She has gotten so big and developed so much right before my eyes. From the day she was born she took everything in. Her eyes wide at the wonderment of the world. So many times I would look at her and wonder how the world look to her, through her eyes. How did she perceive me? Her father? Her room? A tree? The sun? Things that I see everyday and take for granted that they are there. When I was putting her to bed tonight she looked around the room at each thing and took it all it. She paused as she looked at each item, studying it…the Hello Kitty decals on her wall, the Sailor Moon Box Set on her shelf, the stuffed animals all over. I am blown away every time I watch her learn something new, see something or do something new. It is truly a miracle to witness each of these milestones. Photo

She is so intent on learning different things and keeping up with those around her. Her cousin is 3 months older than her so he is already crawling on all fours, pulling himself up and trying to walk. Well my little daredevil does not want to be left behind, She is already trying to pull herself up to walk…well run I should say. She is going to give me a run for my money when she is finally fully mobile.

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I cannot believe that in 6 short months she has learned so much!

Month 1

She slept nearly 18 hours a day and ate the other 6. At least it felt like it. She held my hand for the first time, though I am pretty sure she did not mean to do it! I cuddled her every minute that I could.She was so little and innocent. She just laid there and she was so adorable you could just eat her up.

So precious!

So precious!

Month 2

She slept a little less and ate a little more. This is the point when it really hit me that I am responsible for her. Me!!!!…and her daddy…but still! I am responsible for the life of another human being!!! WTF was I thinking! This is also when the anxiety and slight postpartum depression hit. But not matter how sad or tired I was she still always smiled at me! Happy to be with me and happy to have me as her mother!

Merry Christmas!

Merry Christmas!

Month 3

This month was not too bad! We had settled into a routine and things were looking up! But then 2015 hit, I went back to work and all hell broke loose! Fi decided that she did not want to sleep or eat or sleep! We also realized that Fi has a slight milk protein allergy and eczema. We had to switch to hypoallergenic formula. The formula pretty much went right through her and she was ALWAYS hungry! It was a rough time and my anxiety went through the roof! I did seek help and am doing great now!

Bishop Eustace Here I Come!

Bishop Eustace Here I Come!

Month 4

By 3.5 months she was eating 30-35 ounces of formula a day! This month we decided to sleep train and start solid foods! We began with baby rice cereal, which she loved, and then moved on to stage 1 baby food. We followed the advice and only gave her 1 new food every 3 days. She had a reaction or two in the beginning but overall she did great! Fi started daycare when she turned 4 months old as well! I love daycare! They put her on a schedule and really helped with the “I want to be held at ALL times” problem! Many people bad mouth daycare but I think it is the best thing EVER! This is also when Fi started to roll over and develop her personality! Rolling to her side and solid food really helped her sleep. But I think it was more the fact that she could sleep on her side. She is not a back sleeper.

Nananana!

Nananana!

Month 5

This is when things really started to get fun! I completed my counselling and was now able to really enjoy my daughter. I hated the fact that I was so anxious and having such issues that I didn’t want to come home from work. But by this point things were looking great! Fi started rolling to her tummy to sleep and this made an even bigger difference. She began sleeping through the night! That was just bliss!

I have my ball!

I have my ball!

Month 6

This is now the month we are currently in and I just can’t believe that my little girl is 6 months old! She is crawling on her belly, sitting by herself, holding her own bottle and already trying to stand up! We are moving her to stage 2 food!

I am a big girl now!

I am a big girl now!

They say to enjoy it when they are little because you blink and they are in college, or getting married, or moving out! It is so true! Half a year is gone and my head is spinning is has gone by so fast!

Becoming An Adult

When you become an adult, especially an adult that is about to have a child, your entire world and prospective on life changes. Any and every decision you make revolves solely around how it will affect your family. Will this job allow me to provide the best life for my family? Does this town have the best school system for my children? Do my friends provide a stable environment for my children to grow up in? And so on. These, and many others, are questions that fly through your mind at an alarming rate. You thought, at 16, that becoming an adult was simple. You only had to worry about things like getting a job. All you are thinking about is being old enough to get a cool car, get into the bar, to not have to listen to your parents anymore, doing what you want. But what we don’t realize, at that very young age, is that those were the best times, the easy times. You only had to worry about your finals, if the boy or girl you like noticed you, making that sports team. When you become an adult and your entire world begins to change you find yourself wishing you were a kid again. You find yourself wishing that you could ask your parents to give you the answers to life’s questions. Sadly, you can’t and you must tough it out as an adult and make the best decision that you can and hope your life experiences will allow you to make the right one. Being an adult is a very scary part of life. You may not realize it now but one day it will punch you in gut and your world will never be the same.