So it seems that the major mantra of parents is “This too shall pass.” But what I have noticed since becoming a mom is that nothing actually passes. Every time something funky goes on with Fiona I am told “this too shall pass” but then something else happens. Again, I am told “this too shall pass.” Is this just what people say to parents so that they don’t lose their minds from sleep deprivation? It’s like when people say “every baby is different.” No shit every baby is different. Every person is different. If we were different then we would all be clones and life would be boring. I need a reason for most things. I need to know why something is happening. If my daughter starts acting different from how she normally acts I want to know why. I understand that is a lot to ask because there is not always a straight answer for what is going on but that doesn’t change my desperate need to know “why” or “is she OK” or “she is possessed and I should call a priest.”
No one really prepares your for all these crazy little changes that happen when you have a baby. They tell you it will be “hard” but they are not really telling you the truth. In fact they are down right lying. Parenting is not “hard” it is damn near impossible. The crying for reasons unknown because they can’t tell you, the lack of sleep due to the crying for reasons unknown, the inability to function properly due to the lack of the sleep due to the crying for reasons unknown. I mean it is crazy.
I am incredibly lucky to have the support system that I have. My husband is home from work for 6 weeks not that I am back to work. So he can stay up with her when she won’t sleep and get in the middle of the night when she wakes up screaming (for reasons unknown). My mother lives 2.5 minutes from my house and comes over pretty often to check in and help us out. I also have a an aunt near by that watches Fiona so that we run to the doctor, or run errands, or hell even go to the gym to have a few minutes to ourselves. I honestly can not fathom how single parents are able to do this on their own. I have a new found respect for single parents that are able to do this early part on their own. I know that without the amazing people I have supporting me I know that I would totally lose my mind and screw up my kid.